FERNDALE, CA—Trying to ignore the awkward display of affection being carried out between the two, 15-year-old Scott…
Sometimes, dreams do come true. Not this time, though. Buy this mediocre home and then imagine you live somewhere…
Whether it’s the crisp air, changing leaves, or seasonal beverages, autumn is popular with the Caucasian ladies. The…
ARGOS, NY—Offering an alternative for parents in the community who, for whatever reason, feel they cannot currently…
Discussing spirituality with a young person can be difficult, and that might only become more difficult if they’re…
TOLEDO, OH—Finding themselves distracted and unable to enjoy their meal, local couple Monica and Kyle Hulud told…
This three-bed, two-bath early ’70s split-level ranch has witnessed eight births and three deaths over two…
GATLINBURG, TN—Having assessed the evidence in the couple’s wedding photos, sources reported Monday that local man…
KANSAS CITY, MO—Rolling their eyes as the tulip poplar they sat beneath began to rustle Monday, local witnesses…
NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ—A pleasant, faraway expression overcoming his face, local father Matthew Worley reportedly smiled…
Following the 92-year-old’s announcement that he was retiring from the Fox and News Corporation boards, The Onion…
SEATTLE—Sitting up with a terrified gasp as the realization shook her from her sleep, local woman Sarah Ostrowski…
SPOKANE, WA—No longer able to suppress their percolating irritation with the self-described “culinary prodigy,”…
NEW YORK—Noticing the prevalence of the idiosyncratic plopping noise throughout the slow jam, sources reported…
BAR HARBOR, ME—As he shifted his feet impatiently and tried to pass the time until his hiding spot was discovered,…
BOCA RATON, FL—Claiming that owning the weapon would teach him about responsibility, local 8-year-old Dylan Ellis…
CHICAGO—Locked in what couldn’t exactly be called a power struggle, local man Joe Horochowski confirmed Tuesday that…
GREEN BAY, WI—Eager to move past the fundamentals and dive into more complex territory, impatient guitar student…